Relationship building key to building community on campus and beyond
Of the many participants of the Queers and Peers Mentorship (QPM) program, the hesitant ones are who Andy King (they/them) tends to appreciate most.
Don’t get them wrong. King has been pleased to see staff members from across NAIT sign up to learn from colleagues about the 2SLGBTQIA+ community at large, and help ensure safe spaces for everyone at the polytechnic to learn and work. But a different kind of success comes when people are willing to shift their perspectives.
“Those folks asked some pretty challenging questions,” says King, customer success team lead with Corporate and Continuing Education who has matched up participants over the years and served as a mentor. In the end, “we got to some common ground, which was really cool.”
Since its inception in 2021 as the only program of its kind in Edmonton, QPM has worked to build community at NAIT by increasing awareness, knowledge and inclusivity. For its efforts, it was recognized in a case study by Toronto-based Pride at Work Canada, an organization dedicated to improving workplace diversity based on gender expression, gender identity and sexual orientation.
“Historically, the workplace has been a challenging environment for 2SLGBTQIA+ individuals,” reads the report. “The QPM program seeks to challenge this status quo by creating a platform for meaningful dialogue and understanding.”
Here, King (who co-chairs the program with NAIT colleague Linden Couteret) explains how that status quo may be changed for the better by co-workers meeting for conversations over coffee.
How it started
QPM has been led by staff from the start, thanks to past NAIT employee Jamie Thiessen (Human Resources ’20). Thiessen spun the program out of a “human library” project that had run during the previous Pride Month, says King. “It was really born of the desire to continue those relationships and develop deeper ones.”
About 40 mentees enrolled in that first year.
How it works
“It’s pretty casual and hands off,” says King. Mentors and mentees meet at least once a month, however they choose. “We’re trying to encourage people to develop the relationship rather than focus on any specific goals.”
Additionally, the program hosts events during NAIT’s Pride Week each March.
King emphasizes that QPM is confidential; its success depends on participants being vulnerable but not unsafe.
What it’s supposed to do
While the focus is not to achieve goals, there are goals. As described in the case study, ideally mentees will come away with a greater understanding of issues faced by the 2SLGBTQIA+ community, willingness to support, interest in culitvating more welcoming working environments, and more.
Underpinning all of that, King emphasizes, is relationship building. In some cases, they’ve found that a mentee has become a friend, changing the nature of their conversations.
“We didn't really talk about queer stuff that much at the end of the day,” says King.
Why being uncomfortable is OK
While it’s casual and conversational, QPM involves work in the form of emotional labour.
“We're asking for a lot of vulnerability,” says King.
That applies to both mentees and mentors.
Often, mentees worry about saying the wrong thing (and, probably, they will). But that’s part of the process, says King. “A big part of [QPM] is putting yourself in the discomfort and figuring out how to navigate that.”
“We're asking for a lot of vulnerability."
Mentors may have to find their way as well. Tough or awkward questions (or both) can arise from mentees’ efforts to learn.
Nevertheless, says King, “it's a much more pleasant context to be asked questions that I'm asked a lot of time anyways.” What’s more, they can coach mentees into asking their questions as respectfully as possible – and to steer them away from no-go topics, says King, who identifies as non-binary.
“People will get really curious about medical things and stuff like that. That really isn’t anybody else's business.”
Who benefits
Mentees report a variety of benefits, from enjoying a safe space, to ask their questions to greater awareness of the impact of their biases, to developing friendships that will continue to deepen their understanding of the 2SLGBTQIA+ community.
But mentors benefit, too, and for reasons beyond the support that may come of QPM, says King.
The program “[gives] queer folks opportunities to be leaders. That's really important, because those opportunities are sometimes limited.” (As reported by Pride at Work Canada, “After decades of work on diversity, equity, and inclusion in the workplace, 2SLGBTQIA+ communities are still largely underrepresented at leadership levels in corporate Canada. … Pathways to leadership … are often unclear, barriered, or nonexistent.”)
The other benefit, King adds, is hope in the face of the current state of 2SLGBTQIA+ inclusion, safety and well-being, which show continued signs of being compromised. King looks forward to once again seeing perspectives broaden and shift with the next QPM intake in fall 2024.
“That it is so focused on relationships, vulnerability and human connection, there's so much worth in that,” they say. “There's so much opportunity to be angry about stuff right now, and I'm just tired of that.
“This feels much better.”